Christmas is the most exciting time of the year for most people.

It represents family get-togethers and excited children. It’s a time to celebrate and enjoy the company of family and friends.

For others, it can be a time of misery. It may be this is the first time they are not together as a family. It may be they don’t have their children because they aren’t allowed to have access to them. It may be that dreaded family get-together where you know there is going to be conflict.

I have had many clients who have had a fallout with a family member and were dreading the family get-together fearing it would go pear-shaped.

This is a Monty to happen if we get two people disagreeing who are stubborn. It’s going to be a Mexican standoff with both wanting to be right and will do anything to prove it.

To break any conflict, one has to take the higher road and not get involved. Better still, they can be nice to the other person – which will possibly drive that person nuts!

One way of being nice is to focus on the good traits this person has or their family has. You can focus on who will be present that you like. Another way is to be grateful for what you have and focus on that.

A third way is for you to determine what sort of get-together you want it to be. Most think it will be crappy and, surprise, surprise … it turns out that way. Re-align your thinking into how you would like it to ideally go – given this other person you dislike will be there. I can see you thinking “Ideally, I would like them not be there” J.

Fourth, if this other person is baiting you, let it go. It’s not your stuff. What this person says or does is a reflection on who they are, not who you are. Your reaction or response is a reflection of you!

The late Wayne Dyer had a great saying that is so true:

“When you change the way you look things, the things that you look at change.”

When my clients change the way they view a family member, it is as if my magic, the other person also changes.

Be the better person, take the lead and decide what you want to get out of the get-together. This ensures you have a great time.

Give it a go.